A couple of people have asked what we can do for people that already bought the ebook and would also like the physical version. That’s a fair question and I’m more than happy if that’s you and you buy a hard copy too, to then send you an additional copy free of charge.

Just order as normal and tell me you demand a free copy in the comments field! No fibbing though because I’ll check.

Each book sold helps us put another 10 into the hands of people that either couldn’t normally afford to buy one, or wouldn’t be exposed to such material, so every penny counts.

Nobody Is Motivated By Money

We talk in the book about the simply amazing stat that people who are paralyzed in a road traffic accident are no less happy after recovery than people who have won a 7 figure salary in the lottery.

Time and time again research has demonstrated that money doesn’t motivate people (other than in the immediate short-term) and it doesn’t make them happy. Granted, not having any at all and being faced with the problems that can cause is a great way to ensure misery, but that’s not the same thing at all.

One of the main reasons we take so much time in 'How To Be Rich and Happy' helping people to understand what's important to them in terms of their values, is because that way they can then set meaningful and motivating goals.

NOBODY is motivated by money, people are motivated by what they think money will give them and that usually means happiness.

So what stops you working out what makes you happy and then seeing how much money you need to do that? Isn’t that a more sensible option?

What stops you downsizing and taking a job you love for less money or going back to school to satisfy a life-long ambition to be a teacher or a nurse? How about pulling your 401K to start up your own business?

If that applies to you I'll tell you what stops you, it's fear. But what’s the reason for the fear?

It’s the erroneous and self-limiting belief that you cannot earn less money than you do now and yet be happier.

The reality is you can and I know because I’ve done it and I know plenty of other people that have too.

Not only can you earn less money and be happy, you can earn less money and be more motivated and energized. Doing things you love puts you’re in alignment with your values and that’s about as motivating and inspiring as life gets.

You have one crack at life, just one, so find out what makes you happy and then look for ways to afford to do it.

“Not too bad, but I’ve had better weeks and my leg hurts a bit where that 320 lb lineman fell on it. On the other hand, I suppose it was better than shoveling snow….but not much”

Maybe fate conspires against people like me from ever being famous so we can only think flippant thoughts rather than expressing them to a perplexed public, but I digress.

The guy in question actually gave a much more coherent and sensible answer than I just offered. He went on to say it was the best day of his life after the days when his kids were born.

That’s a Rich and Happy mindset right there. Sure fame and glory are nice for some people, but they alone don’t make anybody Rich and Happy and more often than not they are highly transitory.

A few days later I was watching American Idol (the secret is out, this Life Coach isn't perfect) as the singing wannabes moved onto the Hollywood stage of the competition.

Mike Lynche (one of the competitors) wife was heavily pregnant and shortly before he was due to go on stage for his audition, her waters broke.

This was pure gold for the producers of the show as the guy chatted with his wife on the phone (on the external speaker of course so everybody else could listen) in the privacy of his room with only a camera and sound crew to keep him company.

In the following program it got even better for Fox and the program makers, as the women kindly went in labor live on the show just before her hubby was due to go on stage.

By now they had a camera crew with her too and there was one surreal scene as the father-to-be showed pictures of his wife in labor on his phone when it was obvious they could have simply cut live to the birth.

Let’s leave aside whether this is reality TV gone a tad too far for a moment, because that’s another post for another day. I have no doubt lots of people around the country were oohing and aahing as the shots of the 19 second old infant and proud mother were flashed on the screen.

The real point is this.

The father is without doubt a very good singer, whether he’s good enough to win Idol remains to be seen, although my highly untrained ear doubts it very much.

However, compare the footballers attitude toward the birth of his kids, with the guys on Idol. The footballer was saying winning the Superbowl which is one of the biggest occasions in sport and the pinnacle of achievement for any football player, came second to the arrival of his children.

Whereas the singer was saying with his actions, that the long-shot of winning a singing competition was more important than witnessing the birth of his first child.

It sounds harsh when you say it like that. I do understand if he wins the entire competition or maybe even gets to the last 3, he may be set for life financially, but it’s only money for goodness sake and there are things way more important than money.

I also realize that I am looking at this situation through my own lens and with my own values and that is distorting my view. And also if I’m being fair, I have no idea what his personal circumstances are or were at the time.

Having said all that I just cannot believe his decision was a Rich and Happy decision and I doubt he’ll look back on it in twenty years with pride, especially if he fails to make the last 24 on American Idol.

I’d really like to hear your take. Do you think I’m being harsh or do you agree that some things in life are way more important than chasing money and fame?

Now before you rush to call the men in white coats and tell them to have their very best long sleeved jacket at the ready, let me explain what I mean and offer you 7 reasons that will prove most dogs are indeed rich and happy.

1. Dogs Don’t Hold Grudges

When my younger dog thought it was fun to bite my testicles a few weeks ago, I wasn’t happy and she knew it. After rolling around in agony for a period of time, I then shouted ‘NO!’ at her whilst pointing at my traumatized genitalia.

She sensed I was unhappy with her and skulked away in disgrace to lick her wounds. And before you ask, no I didn't want her licking my wounds by way of reparation.

Within ten minutes she was back complete with a waggly stump and wanting to play. How can you stay mad at somebody that is so forgiving and happy to be alive?

The answer for me is, I can’t and I suspect you can’t either. Happy dogs are like those people that are always in a good mood, always fun to be around and have charisma by the boat load.

2. Dogs Know Their Values

One of the things that rich and happy people understand is what drives them at a core level. The also understand that aligning with their values is absolutely critical if they are going to live the rich and happy life.

So if peace is a top value they seek peace. If love is at the top, they demonstrate love and if their number one anti-value is stress they do whatever is needed to get the proper recovery time from stressful events

Dogs know this too. Dogs may not have the range of values that humans do, but maybe that’s a problem with us rather than our four-legged friends. Loyalty, family, trust, love and in some cases independence are all important values to rich and happy dogs and ones that they never slip out of alignment with.

3. Dogs Don’t Judge People

My dogs don’t care whether you’re the Pizza delivery guy, the mail man, the Pope or even my mother-in-law, they are still happy to see you. They also don’t care if you’re black, white, beautiful, ugly, straight, gay, tall, short or even French. They love everybody that makes a fuss of them.

What would the world be like if it was ruled by rich and happy dogs, eh?

4. Dogs Don’t Waste Money

I have lived with dogs a a good deal of my life. Not once in all that time has one ever returned from the Boxing Day or Black Friday sales and said, “look how much money I’ve just saved!” And then proceeded to hold up a dress the cost of which could have wiped out the national debt of a small Caribbean country.

Now you may be thinking dogs don’t usually carry cash around with them and you would be right. However, if they did, they wouldn’t spend it on luxuries they didn’t need thinking they would make them feel more rich and happy.

Certainly they may go a bit nuts on the pigs ears order and I think steak would take the place of Pedigree Chum, but I doubt they’d be changing cars every two years or borrowing money to buy a home that has four guest bedrooms….you know, just in case people we haven’t seen in ten years want to come and stay.

5. Dogs Don’t Worry

We ran out of dog food one day last week. Did the dogs worry about it?

Nope.

Did they pace around wondering what they were going to have for dinner?

Nope.

Did they have a disagreement with each other over who had to get the car out and fetch some food?

Nope.

They just napped whilst I fetched the food.

Rich and Happy people don’t worry excessively and chronically. Rich and Happy people would prefer to take a nap than worry, and for the most part they would prefer to act than nap.

Worrying serves no purpose, taking action does. Rich and happy dogs take action….or have a nap.

6. Dogs Don’t Try To Keep Up With The Jones’s

Rich and Happy people concentrate on what THEY want out of life. Their happiness isn’t based on some imaginary score card kept by other people, it’s tied to how they feel about themselves and their life.

If they want a boat, it’s because they want a boat and not because their best friend has one. It’s also because they have run it through the ‘rich and happy return’ to decide whether it is going to improve the quality of their life by giving them more rich and happy minutes in proportion to the expenditure.

I take my dobermans to the dog park every day and guess what? They seem completely oblivious to what the other dogs are wearing. They never complain that their collars aren’t diamond encrusted or their leash made of the finest Mongolian Yak hide, they just run around and have fun sniffing each others buts.

For them a rich and happy life involves doing whatever they want (sniffing buts), whenever they want (any time they’re not eating or sleeping)

7. Dogs Don't Feel Guilty

Tori (the black one in the photo) ate a pair of $600 glasses with progressive lenses in about a week after I got them. Since she got told off about it I haven't noticed he struggling to sleep because she is racked with guilt. In fact I haven't actually noticed her looking guilty about anything. She will pull off a sheepish look when trotting past me with my boxer shorts in her mouth, but that's about as far as it goes. She knows rich and happy dogs have no time to feel guilty when a raid on the sock drawer is to be planned.

Of course I could come up with lots more parallels, but I'm intrigued to know whether you think dogs are richer and happier than human beings on the whole?

If you want to read the initial post which sets the stage, feel free.

In my first go at Spanish language training way back in high school, I vaguely recall doing anything with pronunciation.  Since then, whenever I’ve picked up a course or a new book on learning Spanish, I’ve quickly skipped past pronunciation.

It always seemed like the boring part.  I wanted to get to the good stuff where I would learn all the words and therefore be able to understand and start speaking the language.

Well, guess what my initial training down here consisted of?  Pronunciation.  And as I went through the exercise I quickly discovered two things.

First, I was pronouncing most things wrong.  Second, it was very easy to fix that, once I had seen what the correct way was.   As a mater of fact, if you do it correctly, just by practicing counting from one to twenty in Spanish, you can master most of the important components of pronunciation for the entire language.

And after just an hour of practicing and mastering this (I’m very good at counting to twenty), I realized something amazing.  I learned why despite picking up and trying countless audio programs, I had made little progress in the past.

All those times before, I had been trying to build a giant building, but I had refused to start with a concrete foundation.  “I’ll get to that later, or that’s not as important, I’d always say.  Let me just get to the good stuff.”

Except that if you build without a solid foundation, you never get to the good stuff, because you just keep crumbling.

Something tremendous happened after my hour of counting.  It was like someone handed me a two-way decoder ring.  Suddenly, I could understand what people were saying when they were speaking in Spanish.  And they could suddenly understand what I was saying.

I wasn’t fluent by any stretch, but with the foundation now firmly in my grasp, I was able to pick out words that before had seemed like gibberish, but that now made perfect sense.  And I was able to say words that sounded a lot less like gibberish, and a lot more like what they were supposed to.

There is tremendous relevance in my experience to you if you desire a Rich and Happy life.  Rich and Happy people have gotten that way because they took the time to build strong foundations.  They learned what their values are.  They discovered their beliefs and where those beliefs came from.  They became acutely aware of their Big Five for Life.

And because they started with those strong foundational elements, they then were able to successfully build Rich and Happy lives.

In a sense, they had turned on the Rich and Happy decoder ring.  Because once they understood their foundational elements, they could talk with clarity about what they wanted.  They could make decisions easily and without encountering massive stress around what was the right thing to do.  And because they were clear about what they wanted, it became easier for other people to understand and then help them.

I used to jump from Spanish program to Spanish program always looking for the magic one that would suddenly make things clear.  In that same context, I’ve met many people who bounce from book to book, course to course, and coach to coach in their quest to be Rich and Happy.

The Rich and Happy people I’ve studied over the last twenty years don’t fall into that trap.  They have learned that making the initial effort, laying the initial foundation, is what sets you up for even greater things down the line.  Without it, you just don’t make any real progress.

Hasta luego (until next time),

John

Note: Tim is now giving the ebook version of Don't Ask Stupid Questions away for FREE. You do not need to give any e-mail details, it is an automatic download, just click on the link and the book is yours with our compliments!

Well, I am neither a famous singer or a famous songwriter, so walrus seems a bit grand for me.

For my next bunch of posts though-  I am the guinea pig.

Let me give you some background info so you know what to expect with what you’ll be reading about.

I am in the midst of conducting a Rich and Happy experiment.  And the test subject is... me.

Here’s how this came about.

Even though I’ve been researching, documenting and putting to use the Rich and Happy formula for almost two decades, there are definitely still times when I get myself out of synch.

For example, about three months ago I felt like I had let things get a little out of control in my life.  I liked the ways I was spending my time each day, and lots of exciting opportunities were coming up.  Yet somehow it felt like I wasn’t doing a particularly effective job of guiding my life.

Normally I like just being in the flow, as long as the flow is in alignment with my Big Five for Life, and logging me lots of Rich and Happy minutes.  In this instance though, something was telling me that I needed to take the tiller and become a bit more proactive about which stops I was choosing along the river of life.

So I sat down with a blank note-book, and wrote on the front- My Rich and Happy Goals/Dreams/Ideal Life.

I’ve done this many times before, and for whatever reason, it seemed like the right time to do it again.

One of the ideas that had been floating around in my head for almost two years was that I wanted to go study Spanish in an immersion program.  There were multiple reasons for this.  The first is that I love to travel.  As a matter of fact, travel the world is one of my Big Five for Life.

So hanging out in a Spanish speaking country for a while and going to language school sounded pretty good all by itself.  Then there would be the added benefit that since I love to travel, having a greater command of the Spanish language would open up the ease with which I could adventure through spanish speaking countries.  And there are a lot of those.

For example, I’ve done extended trips in Peru, Costa Rica, Panama, Mexico and Honduras, and they were great.  My only frustration was that although my Spanish language skills enabled me to cover the basics, it wasn’t nearly good enough to sit down and have a meaningful conversation with the people in those countries who only spoke Spanish.

And that just didn’t cut it, because I like meaningful conversations.  Especially when I have the chance to learn about the lives of people who live in cultures different from my own.

So that was one big reason.  The other was because I want my daughter to grow up speaking multiple languages.  Right now she gets English from her mom, me, and her environment, Chinese from her mom, and the occasional Spanish word from me.  Hardly the path to fluency for Spanish for her.  So me learning to speak Spanish more effectively would enable me to help her more.

So with notebook in hand I started writing.  And among the many items I wrote down, on page one I put- “I want to go learn Spanish in a 4 week immersion environment before my daughter turns 3.”

And there it was in black and white, or in this case, blue and white.  Just sitting out there waiting to become a reality.

In the How to be Rich and Happy book, we talk about how knowing what you want and writing it down has yielded amazing results for so many people.  There is, without a doubt, a certain power that comes from writing down what it is that you want to do, see, and experience in life.

I don’t know all the reasons it works.  It certainly keeps the items top of mind, so when opportunities arise, such as my re-scheduled engagement, you sort of already know what to do.

There’s also the group impact. Where when you write something down and tell others, then all kinds of people are pulling for you.

Then there also just seems to be an intangible element to it.  It’s like saying to the universe, “No, seriously, this is what I really want.”  So then the universe (insert God, Allah, Buddha, or your alternate preference for the word universe) kicks things into action to help make it happen.

Think of it like turning on the mac daddy of all OnStar systems.  Once you write down your desired state, the system kicks on and starts throwing the appropriate advise, resources, and opportunities your way.

Hey, it doesn’t really matter why it works.  The point is- it works.

And as it always has in the past, it worked again for me.  Two weeks after I wrote my intentions in my notebook, a client called and asked to reschedule a speaking event originally slated for the late fall. When I looked at my calendar I realized that because of the timing of the holidays, and some breaks I had scheduled in after the release of How to be Rich and Happy, that cancellation opened up a six week block of time.

When I told my wife about the schedule change, the first thing she said was, “Cool, let’s go to Costa Rica for the Spanish training you want to do.”

And that leads us right into the experiment.

I thought it might be useful to not only go through the experience of hanging out in Costa Rica for six weeks (It’s tough, but someone has to do it), but to also document the experience from the perspective of the Rich and Happy formula.  In other words, to be the participant as well as the observer to the experience of logging some major Rich and Happy minutes.

After all, while doing whatever you want, whenever you want can have a different look and feel for people depending on their interests, the challenges they face are often similar.

So just a few days into the experiment, here’s what I’ve faced, and what I’ve learned.

We arrived on a Thursday and by the time we drove across half of Costa Rica to where the school is, the day was pretty much shot.  Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were great.  The town where the school is located is right on the beach, very remote, not many people, and spectacularly beautiful.  Fits my ideal scenario of where to hang out for a while, which is a big reason we chose this location.

The place we are staying at will do perfect.  It’s really nice, and has enough creature comforts that I know my family has everything they need to enjoy their time while I’m in class.

The setting is excellent, the place is surrounded by jungle and we have seen monkeys and wild parrots right outside our windows at least twice per day.  The beaches are perfect for my little girl.  There are small shallow rivers for her to play in and tide pools to explore when the tide is low.

My commute to school literally is a 10 minute walk along the beach, including wading across a small river.  I stopped in the school during the weekend and it looked very nice and everyone was friendly.

So imagine my surprise, when about mid-day on Sunday I started to feel an emotion I haven’t felt in a long long time.  Something right in the neighborhood of trepidation and anxiety.

What the...?  Where in the world could that be coming from?  And why?  I’m in paradise on a six week vacation doing something that is right in the sweet spot of my ideal Rich and Happy life.

Why would I feel trepidation and anxiety?

Welcome to the world of values, beliefs, and lots of old code.

If you’ve read the value section in the How to be Rich and Happy book, you know how critical it is to understand your values.  They are at the core of who you are and when you are out of synch with them, it’s impossible to be logging Rich and Happy minutes.

If you’ve read the reviews on the book you’ve no doubt seen a lot of comments about the values section and how great it is.  Well, Tim, my co-author gets all the credit for that and I couldn’t agree more with the comments.  What he created is an excellent tool for deciphering a key piece of what it takes to be Rich and Happy.

And I’m glad he did because as I was experiencing those twinges of anxiety and trepidation I asked myself where the heck that was coming from and why?  And thanks to Tim’s value exercise, I had some great clues as to the answers.

One of my very top values is freedom.  Not surprising given that I’ve spent so much time   looking for the answer to how people get to spend their life doing whatever they want whenever they want.  Also not surprising given that I have created a life where I answer to no-one.

I left the traditional work-force almost a decade ago, I control my own schedule, I live on my terms, I teach and write about living your life, whatever that means to you, and I do everything possible to make sure I get to do whatever I want, whenever I want.

So imagine what just happened in my brain when it finally kicked in that for four weeks, four hours a day, every day, I am going to be on someone else’s schedule.

In addition to that, something else is starting to send massive warning bells through my system.  My previous formal training in learning Spanish was in high school.  Foreign language was a required subject for two semesters and so I took Spanish.  I would rate my overall high school experience to be poor, and my Spanish classes to be below that.

How I still remember this I have no idea, but for one semester my classmates and I had a very nice portly Jewish man from NYC who was teaching Spanish in a Catholic school, and who had never been to a Spanish speaking country.  I’m pretty sure he was about two pages ahead of us in the textbook.

The other semester we had a guy from Bolivia who had such a thick accent we couldn’t understand half of what he said.  I’m pretty sure he hated teaching and I do remember he had a general disdain for how lazy students were in America-  my classmates and I included.

Now to be fair, my overall goal with high school was to get through it and get the best grade possible for doing the least work possible.  And when it came to my Spanish classes they were just a necessary hurdle along the way to graduation.  At that time I saw no relevance at all as to why I needed to learn another language.

Regardless though, because of my previous experiences, my belief system about formal Spanish teaching consists of the following type of data:  boring, irrelevant, uninteresting, and often involves being harassed by authority figures.  A necessary evil that will occupy much of your time in ways other than you want to spend it.

Which means that when those beliefs are matched up with my high value of freedom,  my internal guidance system is starting to send out- what they heck are you thinking, and why oh why, are we going to re-enter formal Spanish training- types of signals.

Incredible isn’t it?  My rational mind is fully aware that what I am about to experience will be nothing like high school Spanish.  The school I will be attending got great reviews when I looked it up online, and everyone I’ve ever asked about immersion programs has always given them rave reviews both for the experiential elements as well as the impact on Spanish language competency.

Add on that that, I’m not a fifteen year old kid anymore who sees no relevance to learning a foreign language and doesn’t want to be in class.  I’m a seasoned traveler who WANTS to be fluent in Spanish, and who CHOSE to be in an immersion program.

That rational mind only has secondary data going for it though in terms of what this experience will be like.  And that secondary data is trying to compete with a belief system filled with old code that was written through first hand experience.

And thus the conflict.

If I wasn’t able to step back from the emotions and look at them from the position of an observer and analyst, I bet the emotions would be out of control right about now.  Perhaps so out of control that I would either be second guessing my decision to attend school again, or in a worst case, I’d completely talk myself out of it and bail on the idea.

I might walk away from six weeks in paradise spent logging an almost constant stream of Rich and Happy minutes.  All because of beliefs and code written in my brain a quarter century ago and the resultant values conflict they cause with my current state.

I can see that this is going to be a very interesting experiment.

More to come in the weeks ahead.

John.